~Wufei Gets a Pet...~
By Victim of Death Glare

Kin&Gin:*with sweet angel faces* MOM CAN WE GET A PET??????

Sally: Oh, uhm..i dunno you're gonna have to talk it over with your father..

Kin&Gin: *gulp* ok...*walk off to find Wufei*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kin&Gin: *find Wufei working on Nataku with Ling watching him carefully* TOU'-SAN!!

Wufei: *hits his head on Nataku* OWW! INJUSTICE! WHAT DO YOU WEAK ONNAKO'S WANT WITH ME NOW?!?!

Kin&Gin: *hug their father tight* We love you!

Wufei: *unmoved* what do you want.....

Kin&Gin: Mommy said we can get a pet if it's ok with you!

Ling: *starts to plug his ears*

Wufei: I WILL NOT HAVE ANY FLUFF BALLS RUNNING AROUND MY HOUSE; BUMPING INTO MY WALLS; BEGGING FOR MY FOOD; AND SHITTING ON MY FLOOR!!! END OF STORY!!!

Kin&Gin: *with sad puppy faces* PLEASE?! We dont have to get a dog or cat! Whatever it is we can keep it in a cage! Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Please? Pl-

Wufei: OK OK JUST SHUT UP!! I'll take you after i'm finished with your weak brother.

Ling: ¬.¬ *thinking* thanks dad....

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*Wufei driving with Kin, Gin, Meiran, Yowamushi, and Kasuka screaming excitedly in the van*

Wufei: ............................*thinking* Kame-sama kill me now! *out loud* SHUT UP ALL OF YOU RIGHT NOW!!!!!

All the kids: *shut their mouths and sit quietly until they reach the pet shop*

Wufei: I will not and repeat for all you deaf weaklings I WILL NOT SPEND MORE THAN 500 CREDITS ON THIS THING!

All the kids: Aww come on Tou-san!

Wufei: NO! Don't you make me drop it lower!

Kin&Gin: hmph!

*At the pet shop*

Wufei: *walks among the noise of puppies and kitties that cost 6438 credits and then comes to.....Gary*

Wufei: 200 credits.......hmmm........*to cashier lady* Weak onna?! What is this.....mammal i see here?

Cashier: ¬.¬ that would be a snail sir. And it is not a mammal, but an invertebrate.

Wufei: whatever...im getting it

Cashier: ok *boxes up Gary and hands it to Wufei* his name is Gary he onl-

Wufei: Look, i know how to handle weak mammals now i shall be going *pays her* WEAKLINGS GET OVER HERE NOW! I GOT YOUR PET AND WE'RE LEAVING!

Kids: WHA?!?! We didn't even get to pick it out!!

Wufei: I did it for you now lets go!

Kids: aww man..........*sigh*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*back at the chang residence*

Wufei: *throws the box on a table and walks away*

*the kids run up in a stampede to see what exactly their father had bought for them*

Mieran*unwraps the box*

*all gasp*

Kin: WTF?!?!

Gin: A SNAIL?!?!?

Kin: Well.......i guess we can like it a little....to make dad happy.......

Yowamushi: sure..............no problem

*all the kids go play outside*

Wufei: *when no one else is around, he walks up to the snail and watches it closely*

Gary: *sits there*

Wufei:.................

Gary: *sits*

Wufei:....................................move.

Gary: *stares*

Wufei: ....................................MOVE!

Gary: *sits and stares at Wufei*

Wufei: Cursed mammal!! *walks away*

Mieran: *looks in the doorway* Tou-san! Gary's not a mammal! He's an invertebrate! *smiles innocently*

Wufei: INJUSTICE! Get out of my sight weak onnako!

Mieran: *shrugs and walks off*

~*~*~*~*Time goes by and when no one else is watching Wufei goes back to watching Gary*~*~*~*~

Wufei: ............*pokes him*................¬.¬ move...

Gary: *stares at him once more and.........sits*

Wufei: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *grabs the snail; chucks it across the room; and watches it hit the wall rather hard*

Wufei: oh shit......... 

Gary: X.X

Wufei: *blinks* DAMNIT! When my weak children see his remains they'll start *vein pulsating* crying!!*thinks: ..........must..........get....a new one......before......they see it...*

Wufei: *scrapes Gary off the wall; flushes him down the toilet; and drives away to get a new snail*

~*~*~*at the pet store once again*~*~*~

Cashier: *eyes Wufei causiously* Hey, weren't you here earlier??

Wufei: ...it died....*goes to find a Gary look alike*

Cashier: ?!?!

Wufei: *glances along the tanks of creatures and finds a suitable match* *picks it up and carries it to the cashier* i want this

Cashier: *takes it from him and puts it in a box* PLEASE take care of this one this time!!!

Wufei: *pays for it then leaves*

~*~*~*~*~back home~*~*~*~*~

Wufei: *places the new gary into its cage* *sighs with relief* no crying

Wufei: *looks at this one and pokes it* will you move for me?

*Wufei sees legs grow out of this new Gary and watches it move across the cage*

Wufei: OMG!! He moves!! *does the happy dance just as Ling passes by*

Ling: WTF?! *thinks: 'So this is what he does in his free time....'*

Wufei: *stops* O.O uhm.......*points to Gary II*.....it uhh......moved...yea.

Ling: baka-yaro......*walks away shaking his head*

Wufei: WHAT'D YOU CALL ME!?!

Ling: NOTHING!! *starts to run*

Wufei: *stands there and ponders what exactly Gary did when he ran*

Wufei:.................you're not a snail are you.......*just as he says this Kin walks into the room*

Kin: WHOA! What happened to Gary?!?!?! He like........has legs!

Wufei: *trys to act normal* oh he's always had legs. Are your weak eyes getting worse?

Kin: my eyes work just fine! That's not a snail!! That's a hermit crab!!!

Wufei: ITS ALWAYS BEEN A HERMIT CRAB! NOW BE GONE!!!!!!!!!

Kin: It was a snail an hour ago.....what'd you do kill the original one or something??

Wufei: No! Of course not!! Leave me!

Kin: whatever.........*as she goes to walk out of the room* *notices a spot on the wall that wasn't there earlier*..............what is this??

Wufei: OH INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!!! ITS NOTHING!!!!! LEAVE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kin: o...m...g..........th-this is a part of Gary's shell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *starts to cry* you did kill him!!!!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!

Wufei: *covers his ears* NOT THE CRYING!!!!!!!!! NOT THE CRYING!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE STOP THE CRYING!!!! I BOUGHT ANOTHER ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kin: i know but..........ITS NOT THE SAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cries*

Wufei: FINE! IF THIS IS HOW YOU'RE ALL GOING TO ACT THAN GARY II IS GOING BACK NOW!!!!!!

Kin: *cries*

*it turns out a pet would just not do in the chang residence.....not another animal was ever seen to go into the house....all the children cried for poor unfortunate Gary I and Gary II, while Wufei slept on the sofa for 2 months for the murder of Gary I* THE END